Why I Thank God for Stress – 7 Reasons You Can Too

I never thought I would be thanking God for feeling stress, fear or anxiety, but I am here to tell you I do. It is a gift. It is a loud danger sign I have come to appreciate and respect. I don’t fight it anymore, I am grateful when it shows up.

How can stress be a positive protector to help you prune out the poisonous people, places and things in your life? What can you do to transform the trouble of today into the triumph of tomorrow? Is there a secret?

This was the topic of a recent discussion I had with Lauren Miller for her Stress Solutions University program.

Imagine for a moment you are driving to meet a friend. You get in the car and probably encounter a red light, slow down for a stop sign, or yield into a rotary. Do you for one moment yell at the red light, resent the stop sign, or get angry because you have to yield? No. You are grateful these signs exist to help protect you from the very real potential danger and destruction of a car accident. You are thankful someone placed these signals across your journey to help protect you from disaster. You humbly accept and follow the rules of the road as a positive part of your everyday travel.

In the same way, God gives you intuitive signals in your five senses to help navigate you safely through life.

The stress you feel when someone betrays you, the anxiety that overwhelms you in a work environment, the sick feeling in your stomach about a decision you have been procrastinating to face. These are all hidden gifts you need to unwrap. God is trying to help you be safe from danger. Stop and pay attention.

How can the feeling of fear or stress become a friend?

  1. Stop and immediately acknowledge and accept your feeling of stress. Notice where and how you are feeling stress in your body.
  2.  Thank God for giving you a sign to protect yourself from danger. Take a power pause.
  3.  Sit in silence with your feelings and ask, “What can I learn from this?” Discover yourself, you’re worth it.
  4.  Recognize that if you are feeling stress, anxiety, fear or confusion, you need to change direction from the source or trigger of these negative emotions. Protect yourself.
  5.  What new actions can you create as a result of this new awareness? What new choices are now available to you? You always have a choice.
  6. Ask God, pray, and/or meditate for the grace, wisdom and courage to implement one of these new options which brings you the most peace. Compassion for yourself is your quickest cure.
  7.  Remember, you don’t need to understand how God is showing up with this message for you to benefit from its’ effects. You use a lot of things in your day that you don’t understand how they work, but you don’t boycott using them because you don’t understand how the results are achieved. Trust.

Consider each seed of stress you despise, can be a source of strength which helps you a grow a great life you love.

 

 

Deb Scott, BA, CPC is a four time award winning author of, The Sky is Green & the Grass is Blue (a Kindle Top 20 Best Seller!), and a top rated best podcaster winner for, The Best People We Know Show, with over 1 million global listeners, and a Top 1% Kred Social Media Influencer. Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills.  In her personal life, Deb battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, depression, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation.  Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you.

Connect with Deb at: http://www.greenskyandbluegrass.com

Progress NOT Perfection: The Real Deal Success Recipe

As Featured in:  Soul Woman Sanctuary Magazine

Why do some people feel happy with so much less than others who appear to marinate in misery with monetary over flowing abundance? Could it be in the way success is measured? Could it be the easiest way to achieve peace in this life exists in progress vs perfection?

Consider the first man on the moon got to his destination by being in a rocket which was on track perfectly approximately only two percent of the time. Only two percent of the entire journey! Yet, the goal was astonishingly accomplished which changed history forever for all mankind. Was it maintaining perfect progress towards the moon or being perfectly on track which most powerfully propelled ultimate victory?

My point is this; consider measuring your life and goals in terms of progress rather than perfection.

Think of something right now you want very much in your personal life, your business, or even in your family which you don’t yet have. Consider the progress you have made in this area in the last year, two years or even ten years, and ask yourself if you don’t instantaneously feel more inspired, uplifted and hopeful.

Realize you might not be where you want to be, but you’re definitely not where you use to be!


 
So next time you need a little jolt of joy in your life journey, adjust your internal thermometer to focus on the great amount of progress you have made in learning, growing, changing and adjusting to the inevitable ups and downs of life, instead of comparing and despairing in the futile illusion of being perfect. The truth is; progress IS perfection.

 

Deb Scott, BA, CPC is a four-time award winning author of “The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue,” and a top rated Best Podcaster winner of “The Best People We Know Show” on blog talk radio, stitcher and player FM with over 1 million global listeners.  Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills.  In her personal life, Deb battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, depression, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation.  Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you. Sign up for Deb’s free mind vitamin monthly newsletter at:  http://www.GreenSkyandBlueGrass.com  

This Story will Shift the Way You Think about Stress Forever

A young lady confidently walked around the Room with a raised glass of water while

Leading a seminar and explaining Stress Management to her audience. Everyone knew she

Was going to ask the ultimate question, ‘Half Empty or half full?’

She fooled them all.   “How Heavy is this glass of water?” she inquired With a smile.

Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. To 20 oz .

She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t Matter. It depends on how long I hold it.

If I Hold it for a minute, that’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my

Right arm. If I hold it for a day, you’ll have to call an Ambulance. In each case it’s the same weight,

But the longer I hold it, the heavier it Becomes.”  She continued, “and that’s the way it is with Stress.

If we carry our burdens all The time, sooner or later, as the burden Becomes increasingly heavy, we won’t be able

To carry on.”  “As with the glass of water, you have to put It down for a while and rest before holding it

Again. When we’re refreshed, we can carry on With the burden – holding stress longer and

Better each time practiced.  So, as early in the evening as you can, put All your burdens down. Don’t carry them

Through the evening and into the night. Pick Them up again tomorrow if you must.

Deb Scott, BA, CPC is a four-time award winning author of “The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue,” and a top rated Best Podcaster winner of “The Best People We Know Show” on blog talk radio, stitcher and player FM with over 1 million global listeners.  Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills.  In her personal life, Deb battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, depression, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation.  Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you. Sign up for Deb’s free mind vitamin monthly newsletter at:  http://www.GreenSkyandBlueGrass.com 

The Allergic to Negative People Pollution Solution

Pollution of every kind certainly catalyzes a visceral response of suffocation, oppression and even depression. “Let me out! I can’t breathe!” That’s what I’m talking about. Pollution that kills and destroys and sucks the life out of you. Pollution that you can visibly see, affect and avoid. Pollution you know is dangerous to your life and accept is all bad for your health. Pollution you don’t want in your life.

But what about the people who pollute your life with stress, anxiety, confusion and constant chaos? What about the people who pollute your life with manipulation, deceit and despair? What about the people who pollute your life with jealousy, rage and anger? What can you do to rid yourself of people pollution such as these?

People Pollution that negatively contaminates the environment of your life is a viral plague of poisonous people who need to be purposely pruned right out of your life.

What’s the pollution solution? How do you clear the smog of people pollution in your life? How do you cleanse your life from the symptoms of this contagious disease?

Smog be gone. Here’s four ways to quickly inject an antibiotic against the effects of this people pollution plague which silently infects the life of many innocent souls. It’s an easy recipe of mind vitamins to feed your whole soul and nurture your spirit with new strength and power to create renewed resistance against this saturating sickness.

1. People Pollution Exists – Accept it.

There is great power in accepting things as they are instead of how you want them to be. Why? Because when you accept the truth of a situation, you are free to make better choices with this knowledge. You must accept some people actually enjoy creating and being immersed in pollution, consciously or unconsciously. Your being uncomfortable with their polluting behavior will not motivate them to change, but it can help you change to feel better.

2. It’s not your fault – Don’t try to justify.

You did not cause the other person to create polluting behavior, and you can’t cure them of it either. Don’t accept unacceptable behavior. Resist the desire to justify bad polluting behavior, or think there is anything you can say or do to change the results of a polluter.

3. Decide for different – Imagine better possibilities & outcomes.

Once you decide you don’t want to be around polluting behavior you are ready to imagine new outcomes and better possibilities of not having that type of negatively affect you. You don’t know what you don’t know. Consider how much energy you will have available to do positive things in your life, when you get back all the precious energy you were expending trying to fight the people who were polluting your life.

4. Spread your Shine – Purify the pollution with positivity.

Let your positive sunshine burn their polluting smog right out of your life. Sticking to your positive standards of peace, compassion, creativity, enthusiasm, faith and confidence in a brighter day to keep you above the clouds like the sun in the sky. The best protection against people pollution is pollution rejection.

The winning equation to your sensational success in being free from the bad fruit of polluting people is accepting people pollution exists. Having a simple strategy to reject the effects of people who negatively pollute your life is a great way to build up a powerful immunity against this deadly disease.        

                                                                                           

Deb Scott, BA, CPC  is a four-time award winning author of “The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue,”  and a top rated Best Podcaster winner of “The Best People We Know Show” on blog talk radio, stitcher and player FM with over 1 million global listeners.  Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills.  In her personal life, Deb battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, depression, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation.  Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you.

Sign up for Deb’s free mind vitamin monthly newsletter at:  http://www.GreenSkyandBlueGrass.com

To Solve a Problem Do This

I don’t worry when I get up in the morning and everything looks blurry because I easily grab my reading glasses and suddenly the world is available to me in a crisp new way. In the same manner, when you feel frustrated, confused or discouraged, you can grab your God glasses and quickly transform what appears bad into something uniquely beautiful specifically wrapped as a custom gift created just for you.

God glasses are available in locations which supply God glasses. You can’t go to the hardware store bread, and you can’t find God glasses just anywhere. You must have the intention to get yourself a pair of God glasses, and then take action to purchase to wear.

I am going to tell you a secret.

God glasses are globally abundant in the most surprising places, and often overlooked by counterfeit products with less than satisfactory results. You have to check the label to make sure your pair is the high quality original name brand. I would suggest you find someone who has the genuine article, who experiences consistent results as promised, and purchase a pair from their same source.

My point is this; if you want to be free of frustration and those demons of doubt, you must be aware not every book, person or theory which claims success truly delivers it. Many self-help gurus claim they have the answer, and at the same time live a contradictory lie. Many shiny websites and fancy marketing campaigns hook you with a glittery veneer and empty contents.

What happens when you buy the lie? You don’t get the promised results. What happens then? You feel like YOU did something wrong because their system didn’t work for you and you subsequently feel even more frustrated, disappointed and discouraged than you did before. Consider the notion there is nothing wrong with you, and there is something wrong with them! You discovered a fraud, and that is not your fault.

I am challenging you to a new way of thinking.

 

Ask more questions, investigate third parties, be cautiously optimistic and believe you are far too precious to spend any amount of time in your life with people, places or things that do not meet standards of authenticity. Bad seeds will never grow a good harvest.

So next time you search for answers to solve a problem in your life, take a moment to pause, grab your God glasses, and know you’re worth the effort.

 

 

 

 

Deb Scott, BA, CPC  is a four-time award winning author of “The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue,”  and a top rated radio host of “The Best People We Know Show” which was a third place finalist in the 2012 Shorty Awards for best podcaster.  Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills.  In her personal life, Deb battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation.  Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you.

Why the Law of Attraction might not Be Working for You

I am the first one to agree your thoughts create your feelings, which then creates your actions, which subsequently builds the reality of your life. To that end, your thoughts can and do create your world.

But what happens when the law of attraction doesn’t seem to be working for you? What happens when you feel like you are doing all the right things, but you end up with all the wrong results. What then?

It deeply saddens me to see anyone beat themselves up for supposedly doing the ‘law of attraction’ wrong. Precisely when the person feels most down about a circumstance in life, the bulldozer of despair dumps a double dose of self-incriminating negativity.

“Why isn’t the law of attraction working for ME?”

Consider you are not doing anything wrong at all. Consider the equation is wrong. 2+ 3 will never equal 4, no matter how much you visualize and wish it to be true.

Could it be where the law of attraction ends where a little common sense needs to begin?

Would you think for one moment Rosa Parks needed to contemplate what the universe was trying to teach her to accept as she walked to the back of the bus because she was black, day in and day out, every day of her life? Would you for one second think that a Jewish victim at Auschwitz needed to contemplate what he/she was doing to attract being rolled into the incinerator to be burned alive? Do really believe the victims who had their limbs blown off in the Boston Marathon Bombing subconsciously put out a frequency with THAT on their Law of Attraction menu? Of course not!

The missing ingredient is thisgood and evil exists, and each person has free will to bring one or the other into the physical world we each live within. Good produces more good, and bad produces more bad. We are each planting seeds first in the garden of our own life, which then scatters more of the same into the lives of others around us.

Each thing in and of itself may not be good, but together they can produce good.

I recently discussed this notion with Cheryl Maloney on Empower Radio (click here to listen). Consider the thought of eating tablespoons of salt, a cup of sugar or raw eggs individually. Pucker up! It does not sound very good to me! Why? Because on their own it’s not. But, stir them all together with some flour, put the mixture in the oven, and viola’, you have angel food cake. Angel food cake is very good.

My point is this, certain things on their own are not always good, and never will be good. No amount of visualization is going to change that. What you can change is to see beyond the individual bad event, and extrapolate the present bad into the potential good result once it is wrapped with a new element of thought, action, belief, event, person, place or thing.

Life is not the all about “me” show, it’s the all about “we” show.

Consider your unfair boss is not the universe or God telling you to reflect and work through a possible childhood issue with an authority figure. Consider your boss needs to learn a lesson to be a fair boss, and you need to step out in courage to bring this to light, and in doing so you will have saved hundreds of other workers unjust treatment.

When the “I” becomes a “we” focus, even illness is transformed into wellness.

So next time you want to beat yourself up for not doing the law of attraction correctly to grab hold of the perfect life you have visualized in your on demand dream board, consider this: You didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, you may be doing something very right.

 

 

 

Deb Scott, BA, CPC   is a four-time award winning author of The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue,” and a top rated radio host of The Best People We Know Show” which was a third place finalist in the 2012 Shorty Awards for best podcaster. Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills. In her personal life, Deb has battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation. Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you.

 

The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue

Selfhelp Book

Available at these fine Bookstores:

AmazonBarnsAndNobleIndieBoundPowellsBooksBooksAMillioin

About the Book “This Book Is A Rewarding experience!” K.B.

National Book Award Winner

Do you want to be happy? Of course! We all want to be peaceful, purposeful, and experience authentic, lasting joy. The Sky is Green and the Grass is Blue, offers fresh, fun, and surprising ways to live in lasting happiness. All ages will enjoy learning how to transform ANYTHING bad into a diamond you LOVE.

Ready to receive a powerful, and effective mind vitamin to be happy? These pages were written for you! Whether you’re a creative spirit or a businessperson, “The Sky is Green” offers insights into happiness from which all can benefit.

Testimonials

About the Author

Deb Scott has provided a fresh perspective to an well-plowed field: empowerment. With wit, humor and extremely well-chosen quotes, she takes the reader through the tools needed to take control of their own life and find joy in doing so. -Sandy Weaver; Radio & Television PersonalitySomething unique and innovative that sets a new standard. -Dr. Alex Concorde


Think you tried everything? You didn’t try this!

  • Do you want to feel refreshed and hopeful about all the new possibilities in your life?
  • Do you want to turn your troubles into useful stepping stones towards happiness?
  • Do you want to discover your greatness and step into your purpose with passion?

This book is a practical, easy to read guide for those who are ready to turn things around in their life, and especially for those who feel they have already tried everything to achieve this goal. Young and old will find these fresh ideas an effective antibiotic to the disease of unhappiness, and a powerful preventative medicine against getting stuck in unproductive thinking or energy depleting relationships with self and others.

Deb Scott, BA, CPC is four time Award Winning Author in Self-Help, Motivation, Deb Scott Award Winning Author Best New Non-Fiction and Self-Improvement for ‘The Sky is Green & The Grass is Blue.’ Deb is a Featured & Top Rated Radio Host of The Best People We Know Show on Blog Talk Radio, with over 1 Million global listeners ranking in the top 1-2% of popularity in 20 categories. The show was an award winner for Best Podcaster in the Shorty Awards.

A high honors Biology major in college, Deb became an award winning Cardiovascular Sales Specialist for twenty years. Deb has worked with and been in surgery with some of the best Cardiac Surgeons in the world. Deb helps people transform their lives by combining her unique practical business and leadership experience as a successful professional, with her passion to help people be the best person they were created to be. Deb has overcome sexual abuse, other’s alcoholism, family dysfunction, been the sole care giver for each of her parents until their passing of cancer, and even encountered financial devastation. Deb understands pain, suffering and is no stranger to even death. Regardless of how hopeless or frustrated you may feel about your situation, Deb can help you find the gifts and good in any circumstance, to know without a doubt the best is yet to come.

Buy The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue
TestimonialIf you want to meet the most powerful and amazing person you will ever know, let Deb Scott introduce you to YOU! Within the pages of this book Deborah offers her first hand advice to gently and effectively guide you, including easy exercises which can assist you, in turning your challenges into celebrations. -Sumner M. Davenport; Results Coach, Bounce-Back Expert;Best Selling Author; The “G” spot, The ecstasy of life through GRATITUDE.
Free Self Help Resources

BTR-The Best People We Know Show
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5 Lessons I Learned from having Breast Cancer

Guest blog post from the Sunshine Survivor:  Annie Mattil Coyne

Annie with daughter Kelsey during Chemotherapy Treatments

One-It is what it is.
Whether the Doctor tells you that you have 6 months to live or they tell you that with surgeries, radiation, chemotherapy, you have a chance to survive. It is ultimately your choice how you deal with it. You can make it the most miserable time of your life or you can embrace the awareness of how precious life really is. I personally chose the high road. My statistics were not great with stage 3 breast cancer. I had a nine month old daughter and I made the decision to fight this in the most positive way I could. I took time for me, to learn how my body dealt with stress, and worked really hard to teach my body and mind to connect in a positive way. Two mastectomies, chemotherapy,radiation, and lots of inner therapy work, fourteen years later I am cancer free today. Hard work pays off.

Two- People have different reactions to illness.
Some of the most loving friends I have, were not really present during my treatments. While others were there with me through it all. I learned that for some people it is to painful for them to see someone they care about struggling through illness. It is not because they do not care, I think sometimes they distance themselves to protect themselves in case something happens, the pain won’t be so bad. They really don’t know what to do. Just being there for the person is what you need to do…just let them know you are there.

Three-When you are a survivor, from anything, your life is never the same again.
It changes you as a person. There are people who will go back to their old life and act like nothing happened…but it is always there. I felt renewed, reborn, blessed. I felt like I was here for a purpose. I found that purpose opening my own hair salon and specializing in selling wigs to cancer patients. I opened my salon one year to the date of my diagnosis. I meet people in their first stages of their journey.I encourage them to be positive and to stay strong and to take charge of their illness. I share my story. No matter how bad your situation, I believe everyone has a purpose. Sometimes you don’t even know you’re purpose. I have a good friend who has been chasing hers, and recently I told her that she has written a book of her life experiences, she has a talk blog radio station connecting great people, I believe she is present in her purpose.She just didn’t know it.

Four- Society is so hung up on body image.
I had reconstruction with my mastectomies, but I never added anything to the breast tissue, so I just have scars. I never realized how much our society focuses on breast until you don’t have them. I have had moments where I have really felt the loss. I tried to explain to my husband when we were on vacation and the resort allowed women to go topless that I felt like it was like bringing someone without legs to a road race. I know that sounds shallow but I really felt the emotional pain. A body part is a body part. I do not dwell on it and I admire women that choose no reconstruction at all.

Five- Society does not like to talk about death.
Let’s face it, we are all going to die sometime. But none one wants to mention it. I have lost a few friends from cancer and when they found out that there was not much more the medical world could do, they wanted to talk about it. A few of them came to me. They said they could not discuss it with their families because they didn’t want to talk about it saying “you will be fine” when in reality they weren’t going to be fine. Or they thought they were giving up. One of my friends was concerned about his funeral…where to have it..what would the music be and so on. To this day I think he had the nicest funeral I have ever been to. He planned the whole thing out. Dedicated songs to certain people, Invited people to share stories..a real celebration of his life. Sometimes just having everything planned also takes a lot of stress off of the family. We as a society should really be able to handle this much better. After all we are always taught we are going to a better place..right?

Annie Mattil Coyne

Well that’s a few of my thoughts.
I am working on a book..from diagnosis through treatment.
The book is called Sunshine Survivor.
The name of my salon is Positive Energy Salon & Boutique in
Exeter, New Hampshire.
I do believe cancer has led me to my calling!

Annie

Connect with Annie on Facebook

Stop Negative Thinking: You vs Your Thoughts

I feel better just reading the blog post headline! Don’t you?

What Are You Thinking?

How to get rid of feeling negative, stressed out, or emotionally charged is a desirable result for most of us, but not necessarily easily achieved by any of us.

Here is a simple “Ah Ha” moment to help shift your perception of how easily it really can be to accomplish.

You are NOT your thoughts.

Why is accepting this knowledge a critical first step towards freedom and success?

Once you know your thoughts, which create the feeling, are separate from the truth of who you are, you are able to make a choice whether that thought will be permitted to create a feeling inside you – negative or positive. Why?

Consider the following image and analogy:

When you are at home, people often come and knock on your door. You pause, look at who it is, and decide if you are going to let them into your home. Your home is your safe and sacred sanctuary and you don’t just let anyone in.  You may speak to them at the door if they are a stranger, or immediately invite them in if you recognize them as loving family or friends.

Now, replace you as the house itself, thoughts are the strangers or friends knocking at your door, and your decision to open or close the door is the power of choice you possess as a result of pausing to assess the quality of thoughts knocking at your door. The thoughts knocking outside your front door are not part of you in the house, but separate entities outside your home. Thoughts knocking for your permission to come inside and be part of your home require your approval and permission to enter.

How does that scenario feel to you?

Your thoughts are what create your feelings – negative or positive. Without the thought first, the feeling can not exist. This knowledge gives you power to understand by pausing and analyzing what the thought is, or what is knocking at your door, before accepting it. This is the real key to controlling how you feel.

Have you ever found yourself saying, “Why am I thinking about that?” The fact you separate yourself “why am I” from the thought “thinking that” clearly demonstrates the distinction between you and your thoughts.

You must think about what you are going to think about! It’s your choice, and easier to do, even really fun, once you are aware you can do it.

 

Deb Scott, BA, CPC

Deb is Author of the National Four time Award Winner Book in: Self-Help | Motivation | Best New Non-Fiction | Self-Improvement; The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue - , a Certified Professional Coach at Discover the Amazing YOU! Coaching, and host of the Top Rated Best People We Know Show! on Blog Talk Radio. Self HelpRadio

Taking complex issues and making them easy to understand. Simple Steps to Stop Suffering Now! Now available on Kindle.

Sign up for Debs “Mind Vitamins” Newsletter today!

Clear the Fear

Are you one of the 5 million estimated Americans who experiences the emotional and often devastating effects of fear related stress?

“According to the National Institute of Mental Health, 19 million people in the United States alone suffer from mental illnesses that involve irrational fear responses. These disorders include generalized anxiety disorder, panic disorder and post-traumatic stress disorder.”

Clear the Fear

Do you ever feel paralyzed by fear?
Fear to change yourself, your career, your relationships?
Fear to try something new?
Fear of failure, loss or even what people might think of you?

Yes, everyone experiences fear to some degree, but not everyone uses fear as a stepping stone instead of a stumbling block.

 

Making Fear a Friend.

At the end of this article our goal is to provide you with tangible tools to:

1. Accurately define what Fear is and what Fear is not.

2. Understand Clinical Data about Fear and Successful Studies how to Overcome Fear.

3. Exercises to help you Clear the Fear from a negative obstacle into a positive opportunity.

 

Are you Born with Fear?

By definition, everyone experiences fear. “It is a distressing negative sensation induced by a perceived threat. It is a basic survival mechanism occurring in response to a specific stimulus, such as pain or the threat of danger.” Fear is a necessary survival mechanism in all human beings.

Anxiety- is future-oriented fear because we cannot control what will happen next.

Panic- is becoming intimidated by something that reminds a person of their fear, creating an alarm response.

Physiological changes in the body associated with fear, the “fight or flight” response, can include:

Rapid heart rate
Increased blood pressure
Tightening of muscles
Increased sweating

 

Good Fear VS Bad Fear

Good fear serves a good purpose. For example, if you have to give a major presentation to a group of professionals at your place of work, fear can motivate you to sharpen your skills to practice and deliver an excellent presentation.

Bad Fear is when fear becomes irrational and excessive, it can become crippling and instigate a cascade of destructive feelings, thoughts and behaviors.

 

Name a personal experience of Good Fear and Bad Fear below:

Good Fear____________________________________________________

Bad Fear_____________________________________________________

 

Creating Fear

“In the 1920s, American psychologist John Watson taught an infant to fear white rats. “Little Albert” had no fear of the laboratory’s test animals. He showed joy at the sight of the white rats especially and always reached out for them. Watson and his assistant taught Albert to be terrified of white rats. They used Pavlovian (classical) conditioning, pairing a neutral stimulus (the rat) with a negative effect. Whenever Albert reached for one of the rats, they created a terrifyingly loud noise right behind the 11-month-old child. Not only did Albert very quickly learn to fear the white rats, crying and moving away whenever he saw one, but he also started to cry in the presence of other furry animals and a Santa Claus mask with a white beard.”

“Like Little Albert’s fear of white rats, a person’s fear of dogs is most likely a conditioned response. Perhaps he was bitten by a dog when he was three years old. Twenty years later, the person’s brain (the amygdala in particular) still associates the sight of a dog with the pain of a bite.”

 

Clearing the Fear

Fear extinction is creating a positive conditioned response that counteracts the negative fear response, usually involving exposure to an outside stimuli. However, scientists have discovered ” stimulating a protein called NMDA (N-methyl D-asparate) in the amygdala can enhance fear extinction.”

Identify a fear you want to eliminate and re-frame:

_____________________________________________________________

"I Want to Clear Away this Fear"

Kerry Ressler, associate professor in the department of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Emory University is studying the biology of fear. And the impact of a neurotrophic factor known as BDNF. “We’re studying how the biology of the brain is changed by the environment, and how these changes underlie memories and experiences.”

Stumbling Blocks into Stepping Stones

The Prevention magazine article “What are you afraid of?: 8 secrets that make fear disappear” offers these tips for dealing with everyday fears:

  1. It doesn’t matter why you’re scared.
    Knowing why you’ve developed a particular fear doesn’t do much to help you overcome it, and it delays your progress in areas that will actually help you become less afraid. Stop trying to figure it out.
  2. Learn about the thing you fear.
    Uncertainty is a huge component of fear: Developing an understanding of what you’re afraid of goes a long way toward erasing that fear.
  3. Train.
    If there’s something you’re afraid to try because it seems scary or difficult, start small and work in steps. Slowly building familiarity with a scary subject makes it more manageable.
  4. Find someone who is not afraid.
    If there’s something you’re afraid of, find someone who is not afraid of that thing and spend time with that person. Take her along when you try to conquer your fear — it’ll be much easier.
  5. Talk about it.
    Sharing your fear out loud can make it seem much less daunting.
  6. Play mind games with yourself.
    If you’re afraid of speaking in front of groups, it’s probably because you think the audience is going to judge you. Try imagining the audience members naked — being the only clothed person in the room puts you in the position of judgment.
  7. Stop looking at the grand scheme.
    Think only about each successive step. If you’re afraid of heights, don’t think about being on the fortieth floor of a building. Just think about getting your foot in the lobby.
  8. Seek help.
    Fear is not a simple emotion. If you’re having trouble overcoming your fear on your own, find a professional to help you. There are lots of treatments for fear out there, and no good reason not to try them under the guidance of someone with training and experience

 

Accepting fear is part of the human condition, being able to identify good fear from bad fear, understanding the science behind the cycle of fear, and what you can do to reframe your fear to work for you, instead of against you, is all possible for you with a little help from your friends.

Love and Blessings,

Deb Scott, BA, CPC  and Elizabeth Hamilton-Guarino, BA, CPC

 

“You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You are able to say to yourself, ‘I have lived through this horror. I can take the next thing that comes along.’ You must do the thing you think you cannot do.”
Eleanor Roosevelt

 

Listen to Deb and Elizabeth discuss the Topic of Clearing the Fear on Call in Coaching
Or Click Below:

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How to Forgive

How do I forgive? More specifically:  How do I forgive the unforgivable?

How do I Forgive?

I believe this is a universal question many of us struggle with. What about you?

I recently had the opportunity to participate in a Forgiveness Global TeleSummit hosted by Nancy Battye with 33 other speakers (click here for the details). The panel and listeners brought up a number of great questions and personal experiences I thought I would share with you.

Here are some highlights to help you heal and forgive.

Forgiveness is in the Will, not in the Feeling

Many people get stuck on being able to forgive because they mistakingly define forgiveness as an emotion instead of an action.

Forgiveness is NOT a feeling. Feelings are nice, and eventually the hope to be free from the emotional negative charge of what you have forgiven, is certainly a worthwhile byproduct of having forgiven. But.. it is not the first step in the process of forgiveness. The very first step is in your free will to make a choice to forgive.

So what do I have to do to forgive using my free will?

You have forgiven if you:

1.Wish no ill will or harm to the person who has treated you unjustly.

2.You pray or send englightenment to the person you are trying to forgive to change for the better – because their soul needs more help than yours.

3.Leave it to God or your Higher Power to resolve the issue in a manner of divine justice for the good of all involved.

Forgiveness is not your idea of making the wrong right, but allowing God to make the wrong right.

Self Forgiveness

Your ability to forgive someone else is a direct reflection of how much you are able to forgive yourself.

Consider the following scenario…

A perfect stranger in the street yells out your are stupid and ugly – how do you react? Probably without much emotion considering the source.

Now imagine the person you love most saying the exact same words to you. How do you feel now? Probably much different from the first scenario.

Why?

The words were exactly the same – but your emotional response was completely different. The only deduction you can logically make is that it is more than the words which matter to you. It is not what is said – but the source of your emotional connection to the person who speaks to you, what their relationships means to you, what trigger they push in you from your past., and how you view yourself.

Salt only hurts when it hits an open wound. The fact you are in pain proves there is wound open which you need to heal.

When in Pain, Focus on:

1. What is the gut reaction teaching me? What do I need to learn about myself?

2. What is the wound I need to heal?

3. Be grateful for the gift of discovering the real issue and the opportunity to finally heal, so you can be emotionally free from it.

Don’t Obsess

Over thinking the problem, pain and past event does nothing except hurt you again.

If you don’t let go of this negativity, you must ask yourself these two questions:
“Why do I want to keep myself marinated in this poison of self destruction?”
Why do I not love myself enough to stop staying in the pain?”

Give up the hope of a better past.  Focus your precious energy on what you can control and change for the better.

Forgiveness begins with forgiving yourself. Trusting God more, and depending on yourself less. Listening to the whispers and warning signs God may be giving you in the silence of your prayer, or through other people.

Forgiveness is a process

You don’t put an acorn seed in the ground and expect a full grown 20 foot acorn tree to be looking back at you 20 minutes later! Why would you expect this unreasonable result from yourself?

Be patient with yourself, and focus on the size of your God and the great progress you have made. Not the size of your problem or how far you think you have to go.

“He who does not forgive digs two graves.” Chinese Proverb

 

Deb Scott, BA, CPC

Deb is Author of the 2 x National Award Winning Book The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue - turning your upside down world right side up!, a Certified Professional Coach at Discover the Amazing YOU! Coaching, and host of the hit new Best People We Know Show! on Blog Talk Radio. Self Help Radio

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Stress Less & Enjoy More

Stress Less & Enjoy More: Self-Help Facts; Problems; Solutions

Do you want to stress less and enjoy your life more fully?  Consider these facts, if you’re still not sure.

Stress Facts

  • 75% of the general population experiences at least “some stress” every two weeks (National Health Interview Survey).
  • Every week, 95 million Americans suffer some kind of stress related symptoms for which they take medication.
  • The American Medical Association has noted that stress was the basic cause of more than 60 percent of all human illness and disease .
  • The stress hormone cortisol not only causes abdominal fat to accumulate, but it also enlarges individual fat cells, leading to what researchers call “diseased” fat.
  • Chronic stress floods the brain with powerful hormones that are meant for short-term emergency situations. Chronic exposure can damage, shrink, and kill brain cells.
  • Researchers “Nature Neuroscience” Ferguson and Magalhaes have discovered a biological link between stress, anxiedty and depression. The linking mechanism in the study involves the interaction between corticotropin releasing factor receptor 1 (CRFR1) and specific types of serotonin receptors (5-HTRs). The chemical connections is real.
  • Your body’s reaction (s) to negative stress can include but not limited to: anxiety, anger, fatiuge, dizziness, heacaches, chest pain, aches and pains, grinding of teeth, sexual difficulties, sleeping problems, cold sweaty palms, inability to concentrate, elevated blookd pressure, change in eating habits, indigestion and upset stomach.

Wow! If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, Stress is NOT something good to have in your life. But how do you get rid of stress? What can you do to remedy the disease? [Read more…]

Heart – What is Your Heart Telling You?

As featured in:  Best Ever YOU! Magazine

What is your heart telling you?

Your Heart Speaks!

You’ve heard it before. Doctors tell you to maintain a “healthy heart” to keep a healthy body. Your relationship has gone sour, and you talk to your family and friends about your “broken heart.” Therapist speak of your “heavy heart” catalyzing depression, and exercise trainers emphasize you won’t achieve your targeted weight until you perform aerobic exercise at your “target heart rate.” Even the Bible tells us to “guard your heart with the closest custody, for in it are the sources of your life.” Yes indeed, the heart is the universal symbol that speaks love in any language.

It would appear, the answers you most desire in your head, can only be discovered through the spiritual journey into your heart.

Heart Ache can be one of sadness or joy, but make no mistake, it can never be ignored. When you feel that tug in your heart – know in your head it’s a powerful prompt and call for you to take some immediate action.

If you have recently loss a loved one, you know what heartache does to your entire body in the grieving process. The sadness seems to embed itself into each blood cell pumping throughout your veins. Be gentle with yourself, for this is your call to heartfelt peace.

I <3 You

The freshness of a new found love will wrap your heart in an ache of euphoria -to the point you can’t think of anything else but your beloved.
Your mind will wander into daydreams of pleasant reminders with the one you love, automatically recycling the happiness of unending blissful joy.. Yes, your love ache can quickly become an addiction which sweeps you down the aisle of “I do – until death do us part.”

When you pray or meditate, you can only experience transformation through prayer from the heart. You must experience the words you speak, the affirmations you visualize, in order to generate any success in your ultimate transformation. Words are just empty vessels without value, if you don’t pour authenticity into the equation.

To be truly alive requires a functioning heart. You can’t take a breath without your heart. Your heart is the center of your being, the ultimate indicator of being human. Your heart is the greatest gift you can ever give to another, and the most powerful motivator in achieving your dream.

As you focus on tangible ways to improve the clinical health of your heart, don’t forget to incorporate creative ways to hear the messages your heart beats to speak to you.

Beauty & PeaceA heart filled with love and forgiveness is a medicine without any side effects, and a reliable cure for challenges even the blind can clearly see.

Deb Scott, BA, CPC is Author of the 2 x National Award Winning Book The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue - turning your upside down world right side up!, a Certified Professional Coach at Discover the Amazing YOU! Coaching, and host of the hit new Best People We Know Show! on Blog Talk Radio.  Sign up for Debs Newsletter today!

Celebrity Interview – Montel Williams and Deb Scott

Man of Power and Women of Power!

Montel Williams and Deb Scott are interviewed by Award Winning Radio Host, Raven Blair Davis.

Do you want to learn how to step into your greatness?  Good change is just a click away!  Listen NOW!

Award Winning CNN and CBS Radio Host: Raven Blair Davis - “The Talk Show Maven” combines two unstoppable people of power in this amazing rare interview to inspire, motivate, and emPOWER you to be unstoppable.

Listen NOW !

Award winning Talk Show Host Montel Williams speaks to Raven from the heart and shares a chilling experience he had 10 years ago when he “thought” he was having a heart attack. You’ll also hear Montel speak about the effect MS has on his body. The importance of not taking life for granted, Montel talks about the day he got fired over the telephone and how he was forced to take control of the situation and create a new opportunity for himself and shares why we should to start paying attention (focus) to our physical and psychological well being …..starting today!

Listen as Raven gets up close and personal with Life Coach and Award Winning Author, Deb Scott.  How Deb overcame the battles you may have experienced too.  Sexual Abuse, others’ alcoholism, family dysfunction, depression, an abusive relationship, care taking to death, and financial devastation.  Find out why you are only as sick as your secrets, and how the most difficult challenge you battle today can actually be a springboard to your most cherished celebration in your tomorrow.

This is a must listen to life changing combination of how to use your deep pain and turn it into positive productive power!

Listen NOW- Good Change is about to happen!

5 Tips to Keep Your Peace

 
 
 

Get Me Out of Here!

Are your days hectic, busy, and filled with unexpected obstacles to overcome? Do you feel like you need a break from the stress? Good news! You’re not alone in feeling the chaos, and now you won’t be alone in learning new ways to keep your peace.

Imagine you are an Olympic athlete walking on a balancing beam. You are deep in focus to perform your task perfectly on a three inch wide beam. You have practiced this move more times than you can count, and your confidence is strong. You begin your jump with focused momentum, when suddenly a loud distracting noise goes off in the stadium. The event surprises you, and captures your attention just long enough to cause you to lose a bit of your footing. You’ve trained tirelessly, and with anticipated interception to overcome an error in your landing, you quickly regain your balance to complete the move with majestic success. Congratulations! The applause from the crowd is only surpassed by the joy beaming out of your heart.

"I adjust my Balance Easily."

Maintaining your inner peace is a lot like that balancing act. You need to accept the unexpected is part of the process, and train yourself to successfully overcome the inevitable obstacles when they occur. You need to have the tools readily accessible to combat the confusion.

Here are 5 Terrific Tips to Keep Your Peace.

1. “What can I learn from this?”

One of the best ways to detach yourself from the emotional turmoil is to seek the solution in the problem. The gift of more peace may be wrapped in disguise. Is someone always criticizing you for never doing “it” good enough? Consider this as an opportunity to set better boundaries from negative people in your life. You may be able to learn how to practice letting go of this toxic personality in your life, which will help you avoid more of the same poisionous brand in the future. Always interrupt the disturbance with this thought, “What can I learn from this?”

2. Calling my rescue team!

Get into this habit, and practice it often. Ask for help from your spiritual rescue team. It doesn’t do you any good to have a million dollars in the bank if you don’t know it’s there, and you can’t enjoy the benefits of spiritual strength if you don’t ask your spiritual support team for assistance. Put the breaks on a chaotic encounter, or emotional disturbance, with a silent prayer for protection. God, your angels, the saints, family members who have passed on, they are all in your corner cheering you on to overcome any obstacle. Knowing you have a heaven sent support system at any moment you need, is a fail-safe security system. “Help!” is always a good start.

3. “What is my emotional temperature?”

Implement a new way of thinking which recognizes what comes out of someone else’s mouth is not necessarily the truth about you. The other person’s action igniting a reaction in you, is a good indicator of something YOU need to get healed. Consider the feeling of stress a temperature reading of your spiritual health. Are you way above normal? Feeling the fumes? Too hot to handle? Realize this awareness is a gift. Salt only hurts on an open wound, and if something hurts, that something in you needs to be healed. Awareness is key. A wound once healed is stronger than before, and the same came be true for you.

4. Practice Successful Sabotage

Set yourself up for success when the unavoidable storms hit you in the face. Hurricane winds may pass by you by, but they don’t have to uproot you if your deeply dug into solid ground. Sabotaging yourself for success is taking premeditated action to win the war against the battlefield of the mind. If you know your boss is going to be unreasonable during the day, make sure you have effective mind vitamins to counteract the negativity. Positive affirmations, favorite quotes, images which bring you peace, anything you know makes you feel happy and empowered should be strategically placed and readily available at your fingertips. Surround yourself with the fragrance of success. Breath in your ability to overcome any adversity. You are a champion!

5. Look for the humor in the horror.

Studies show laughter releases endorphins, which makes you feel good. Seeking solutions with a sense of humor will help you detach from the negative feelings, and open your mind to fresh choices. Sometimes the catastrophe can be the cure. If you have been seeking more quiet time alone, the fact your car broke down right after you ran out of gas, could be a unexpected opportunity to sit in silence while you wait for the tow truck. You can’t hear the kids screaming now! Laughter is a great medicine without any side effects. “Don’t take life too seriously, you’ll never get out alive.” Ebbert Hubbard.

The key to keeping your peace is having a solid, readily available, armamentarium to fight the peace killers successfully. Understanding you can’t stop the negative events, but you can stop their accompanying negative feelings from contaminating you further, is part of your winning equation.

Begin now. You’re worth the effort!

The Perfect Gift for You or Someone You Love...

Deb Scott, BA (Beta Beta Beta), CPC, is author of the award winning book changing lives, “The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue - turning your upside down world right side up!” For more about Deb’s coaching, speaking, or radio show,  sign up for her mind vitamin newsletter now.