22 Ways to Make Your Life Happier

When you shine from the Inside You don’t need the Spotlight.

I am grateful for this opportunity to share, reflect and hopefully impact your life in a meaning way by sharing the qualities necessary I have discovered to live a truly meaningful life. We must live life forward, independent of being able to only understand the events and results of the choices we make in hindsight.

The unexamined life is not worth living. Socrates

I’ve experienced a few challenges of my own on this journey called life, and I know you have too. Mine were packaged growing up in a dysfunctional family, being sexually abused by a teacher I should have been able to trust, dealing with the effects of others’ alcoholism, battling depression, being a sole care giver to both my parents until their death, and even financial devastation (just to name a few).

In the professional world I appeared to be a success. My biology degree launched me into twenty years of award winning cardiac surgery sales. I learned a lot about business, and even more about people. Being in surgery frequently selling my beating heart surgery devices, I saw first-hand everyone has the same color blood running through their veins no matter what shape, color, size, religious belief, age, or language they spoke on the outside. We are all the same on the inside.

So here’s what I have learned along the way. I hope you apply these insights into your life so you can recognize, accept and apply the lesson quicker than I did. If you do, I am confident they will help you create a magnificent satisfying life beyond your best dream. You will make the world a better place for yourself and everyone you meet. You matter.

 

1. Shine from the Inside and You Won’t Need the Spotlight.
All the awards, money and fame that may put you in the shiny spotlight to the worlds view on the outside will never give you the peace and happiness you seek on the inside. Genuine joy will only come from aligning with your inner core values and the moral compass you seek to keep. Be pushed by your life mission statement, not pulled by other people’s agendas.

2. Don’t let your Happiness come from Other People’s Minds.
Being motivated by what other people think is like taking arsenic and expecting the other person to die. Being motivated by other people’s approval will deceptively lead you over the cliff of destruction every time. You will always have people who dislike you, disagree with you, and even strive to destroy you. Expect it, forgive them, let it go, and be you.

3. You can’t unscramble the Scrambled Eggs, but you can create Delicious New recepies for omelletes.
Everyone makes mistakes, has regrets, and does the “could a, would a, should a” self-talk scenario. Accept this as part of the process of being a human being. Focus on researching those tragedies to learn their value in creating something better you could never have experienced or shared without them. Priceless precious diamonds are always created under pressure.

4. Befriend your Fear and Stress as Safety Stop Signs in your Travels.
You don’t drive down the street resenting the stop sign, traffic lights or yield signs along the road to wherever you are going. You are grateful they are there to protect you and keep you safe from disaster or even death. Look at your feelings of stress, confusion or fear as gifts from God and the universe to help you pause and avoid potential danger. Seek the message and redirect your actions accordingly.

5. Listen to learn not to Justify.
You can’t hear what the other person is saying when you are having two conversations in your head, the one you are saying and the one you want the other person to be saying back in response to you. It takes courage to listen without premeditated justification of your own opinion. Be humble.

6. It’s a Bad Day not a Bad Life.
When life gets you down and everyone on planet earth feels this way from time to time whether they admit it or not, remember no pain or joy lasts forever. Your feelings are moving constantly like the clouds in the sky. Every experience is creating something greater than yourself not only for you, but everyone around you. Remember, you’re not finished yet.

7. Your life is between you and your God, adjust accordingly.
Life is so much easier when you only have one person to please instead of thousands, hundreds or dozens. Live your life for what God thinks of you, because your boss, your friends, and even your family won’t be judging you in your life review. Make sure your life is something you want to watch again. Ask yourself in every decision you are about to make whether or not you want to see yourself making that choice again, and the results it created.

8. Collect moments not things.
Ask yourself in every goal you desire to achieve if the prize is something which will live on with value in your memory. Stuff creates dust, but the moments of being with your parents, your children, your community will live within the protection of your heart long past the day they die.

9. Reflect often on Your Death to help you really Live.
Last I checked, no one is staying. You are going to die, and you don’t know exactly how or when. This truth should motivate you to live each day as if it were a separate life. Reflect often on your death and you will quickly gain insight into the truth of your priorities.

10. Seek the lesson in each painful problem to find your peace and purpose.
Everyone experiences suffering and pain. This is part of life you must accept and not fight. Embrace this reality and use it to learn about yourself, what you value, why you hurt, what matters in the core of your moral compass. Discover yourself. You will learn quickly how attached you are to a person or thing by the amount of pain you experience when it is gone.

11. Words are Meaningless, you can only believe a person’s Actions.
Words are empty vehicles which mean nothing without the complimentary action to back them up in truth. The husband who beats his wife and says I love you is a liar. People lie. You will never stop people from being deceitful, manipulative or revengeful. Sociopaths really exist, and you will meet more than you will probably ever recognize. Always judge a person by truth of their actions, and this includes yourself.

12. Dump the Drama.
Drama can be an addiction like anything else. If you are surrounded or find yourself frequently talking about drama, it’s time to let go of your need to control. The source of your pain is that you want to control other people. Focus on you. If you can’t enjoy your own company, don’t expect anyone else to.

13. Right is Right is no one is doing it, and wrong is wrong if everyone is doing it.
Stand for something or you will surely fall for everything. You must believe in what you are doing regardless of what other people are doing or telling you to do. It’s not about them. Check your motivation for everything you do and realize it is your motivation which creates the honest intention towards that end result.

14. Trust your Intuition and Understand why you did later.
That little voice which whispers inside your soul that tells you there is something not right, something that doesn’t add up, something that creates a feeling of confusion or doubt, is God’s gift of guidance to you. Trust your intuition and don’t try to justify bad behavior in your head. Sometimes the ego distorts your spiritual eye sight.

15. Employee performance Reviews are designed to protect your Employer not to Help you become a Better Employee.
Those once a year performance reviews which seem to be designed to help you improve your skill set on the outside, are in fact designed to create legal justification for letting you go, not giving you a bigger pay raise or anything else the employer wants to justify. Don’t ever sign a performance review you disagree with, and never feel intimated that you have to sign it. Stand up for yourself, you’re worth it.

16. Don’t believe Everything You Think.
The negative communication committee inside your head is always going to chatter something crazy. Sometimes what you think or feel may not be true. No one knows everything at all the time. Sometimes you just have to laugh when you want to cry.

17. It’s about Progress not Perfection.
There is no such thing as perfection. Life is fair to all precisely because it is unfair to all. Focus on your progress towards a goal instead of some imaginary standard of perfection you have decided you need to do whatever it is you want to do. Always find something to be grateful for in your progress towards accomplishing your goal. The greatest people are always the most grateful people.

18. You are the People you Associate with, chose wisely.
Make a list of the people you associate with and the qualities you admire and detest in each. You will discover who you are through this exercise more than you will discover anything about them. Let go of poisonous people. Be very allergic to negative people. Surround yourself with people who respect and appreciate you in word and action so you can appreciate and respect yourself.

19. Be Humble.
This is the greatest attribute anyone can ever have, and I measure this quality in each person I meet, including myself. Whatever you have in a talent or material possession is a gift. When you get up in the morning a take your refreshing shower, remember there are thousands of people in the world who don’t even have clean water to drink let alone take a shower in. If you have food, shelter and health, you really have it all.

20. Don’t Borrow Sorrow from Tomorrow.
There are only two days in your life when you can’t accomplish anything; yesterday and tomorrow. Live in the present moment. Keep your head and heart focused on today. Today is all you have, and for the thousands of people who will die today, they won’t even have that.

21. Don’t go to the Hardware store for Bread.
Consider why you expect a person, place or thing to give you the result you seek. You will never be able to change other people. Accept people as they are instead of what you want them to be, and you will set yourself free to make better decisions. Let go quickly.

22. Pray, Pray, Pray.
This is the golden key which unlocks the meaning of your life. Prayer is the path which leads to truth which can only be discovered in the silence of your heart. You must pray to open the flood gates of love into your soul. Spiritual jewels of love and peace will never be found in the material world. Life is not fair, only God is fair.  The best prayer you can ever say is thank you God for everything, because everything is truly a gift. You are a gift to this world, unwrap yourself. You didn’t come here by accident. You have a specific purpose in the design of humanity to do something which no one else can create. Share your shine, the world needs you.

 Did you enjoy this post?  
Stay connected!  Sign up below for my Monthly Mind Vitamin News!

For Email Newsletters you can trust

Deb Scott, BA, CPC is a four time award winning author of, The Sky is Green & the Grass is Blue (a Kindle Top 20 Best Seller!), a top rated best podcaster winner for, The Best People We Know Show, with over 1 million global listeners, and a Top 1% Kred Social Media Influencer. Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills. In her personal life, Deb battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, depression, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation. Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you.

Connect with Deb at http://www.DebScott.com 

 

 

Why I Thank God for Stress – 7 Reasons You Can Too

I never thought I would be thanking God for feeling stress, fear or anxiety, but I am here to tell you I do. It is a gift. It is a loud danger sign I have come to appreciate and respect. I don’t fight it anymore, I am grateful when it shows up.

How can stress be a positive protector to help you prune out the poisonous people, places and things in your life? What can you do to transform the trouble of today into the triumph of tomorrow? Is there a secret?

This was the topic of a recent discussion I had with Lauren Miller for her Stress Solutions University program.

Imagine for a moment you are driving to meet a friend. You get in the car and probably encounter a red light, slow down for a stop sign, or yield into a rotary. Do you for one moment yell at the red light, resent the stop sign, or get angry because you have to yield? No. You are grateful these signs exist to help protect you from the very real potential danger and destruction of a car accident. You are thankful someone placed these signals across your journey to help protect you from disaster. You humbly accept and follow the rules of the road as a positive part of your everyday travel.

In the same way, God gives you intuitive signals in your five senses to help navigate you safely through life.

The stress you feel when someone betrays you, the anxiety that overwhelms you in a work environment, the sick feeling in your stomach about a decision you have been procrastinating to face. These are all hidden gifts you need to unwrap. God is trying to help you be safe from danger. Stop and pay attention.

How can the feeling of fear or stress become a friend?

  1. Stop and immediately acknowledge and accept your feeling of stress. Notice where and how you are feeling stress in your body.
  2.  Thank God for giving you a sign to protect yourself from danger. Take a power pause.
  3.  Sit in silence with your feelings and ask, “What can I learn from this?” Discover yourself, you’re worth it.
  4.  Recognize that if you are feeling stress, anxiety, fear or confusion, you need to change direction from the source or trigger of these negative emotions. Protect yourself.
  5.  What new actions can you create as a result of this new awareness? What new choices are now available to you? You always have a choice.
  6. Ask God, pray, and/or meditate for the grace, wisdom and courage to implement one of these new options which brings you the most peace. Compassion for yourself is your quickest cure.
  7.  Remember, you don’t need to understand how God is showing up with this message for you to benefit from its’ effects. You use a lot of things in your day that you don’t understand how they work, but you don’t boycott using them because you don’t understand how the results are achieved. Trust.

Consider each seed of stress you despise, can be a source of strength which helps you a grow a great life you love.

 

 

Deb Scott, BA, CPC is a four time award winning author of, The Sky is Green & the Grass is Blue (a Kindle Top 20 Best Seller!), and a top rated best podcaster winner for, The Best People We Know Show, with over 1 million global listeners, and a Top 1% Kred Social Media Influencer. Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills.  In her personal life, Deb battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, depression, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation.  Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you.

Connect with Deb at: http://www.greenskyandbluegrass.com

Progress NOT Perfection: The Real Deal Success Recipe

As Featured in:  Soul Woman Sanctuary Magazine

Why do some people feel happy with so much less than others who appear to marinate in misery with monetary over flowing abundance? Could it be in the way success is measured? Could it be the easiest way to achieve peace in this life exists in progress vs perfection?

Consider the first man on the moon got to his destination by being in a rocket which was on track perfectly approximately only two percent of the time. Only two percent of the entire journey! Yet, the goal was astonishingly accomplished which changed history forever for all mankind. Was it maintaining perfect progress towards the moon or being perfectly on track which most powerfully propelled ultimate victory?

My point is this; consider measuring your life and goals in terms of progress rather than perfection.

Think of something right now you want very much in your personal life, your business, or even in your family which you don’t yet have. Consider the progress you have made in this area in the last year, two years or even ten years, and ask yourself if you don’t instantaneously feel more inspired, uplifted and hopeful.

Realize you might not be where you want to be, but you’re definitely not where you use to be!


 
So next time you need a little jolt of joy in your life journey, adjust your internal thermometer to focus on the great amount of progress you have made in learning, growing, changing and adjusting to the inevitable ups and downs of life, instead of comparing and despairing in the futile illusion of being perfect. The truth is; progress IS perfection.

 

Deb Scott, BA, CPC is a four-time award winning author of “The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue,” and a top rated Best Podcaster winner of “The Best People We Know Show” on blog talk radio, stitcher and player FM with over 1 million global listeners.  Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills.  In her personal life, Deb battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, depression, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation.  Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you. Sign up for Deb’s free mind vitamin monthly newsletter at:  http://www.GreenSkyandBlueGrass.com  

This Story will Shift the Way You Think about Stress Forever

A young lady confidently walked around the Room with a raised glass of water while

Leading a seminar and explaining Stress Management to her audience. Everyone knew she

Was going to ask the ultimate question, ‘Half Empty or half full?’

She fooled them all.   “How Heavy is this glass of water?” she inquired With a smile.

Answers called out ranged from 8 oz. To 20 oz .

She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t Matter. It depends on how long I hold it.

If I Hold it for a minute, that’s not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my

Right arm. If I hold it for a day, you’ll have to call an Ambulance. In each case it’s the same weight,

But the longer I hold it, the heavier it Becomes.”  She continued, “and that’s the way it is with Stress.

If we carry our burdens all The time, sooner or later, as the burden Becomes increasingly heavy, we won’t be able

To carry on.”  ”As with the glass of water, you have to put It down for a while and rest before holding it

Again. When we’re refreshed, we can carry on With the burden – holding stress longer and

Better each time practiced.  So, as early in the evening as you can, put All your burdens down. Don’t carry them

Through the evening and into the night. Pick Them up again tomorrow if you must.

Deb Scott, BA, CPC is a four-time award winning author of “The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue,” and a top rated Best Podcaster winner of “The Best People We Know Show” on blog talk radio, stitcher and player FM with over 1 million global listeners.  Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills.  In her personal life, Deb battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, depression, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation.  Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you. Sign up for Deb’s free mind vitamin monthly newsletter at:  http://www.GreenSkyandBlueGrass.com 

Our Top 5 Blog Posts are…

And the Winners are…. 

You Picked Them & You Shared Them! 

(just click the topic title for more…)

1.Why the Law of Attraction Might Not Be Working for You.
(Be sure to check out all the awesome reader comments!)

2. How to Trash Your Toxic Thoughts.

3. The 7 Most Important Things to Do Before You Die.

4. The “I’m Allergic to Negative People” Solution.

5. To Solve a Problem, Do This!

Thank you for the Caring & Sharing! 

Deb Scott, BA, CPC is a four-time award winning author of “The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue,” and a top rated Best Podcaster winner of “The Best People We Know Show” on blog talk radio, stitcher and player FM with over 1 million global listeners.  Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills.  In her personal life, Deb battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, depression, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation.  Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you. Sign up for Deb’s free mind vitamin monthly newsletter at:  http://www.GreenSkyandBlueGrass.com  

When Things Seem to be at Their Worst – Remember this…..

(As Featured in Simple Steps to Real Change Magazine)

Anyone who tells you they don’t have a bad day now and then, or some tough moments of struggle, or has all the answers, is a liar. Run away as fast as you can in the opposite direction.

The truth is, as long as you are living on planet earth in the skin suit, you are going to have to deal with some amount of pain, sorrow and sadness. In situations such as these, it is important to remember this: there is always a big picture.

How can remembering there is a bigger picture in the immediate moment of unhappiness help to alleviate your pain? How can this one awareness transform the horrible into the tolerable, or even acceptable? How can this belief help you feel better when you are in the midst of feeling your worst?

Consider your current difficulty is the catalyst for a change which elevates you in two years to begin the new business you have yearned to create for over a decade. Consider your current difficulty is the catalyst for change which elevates you to understand your true vocation is to share your story with the world and write your book. Consider your current difficulty is the catalyst for change which elevates you to break free from fear and the demons of doubt holding you back from enjoying your own company regardless of outside opinions. Consider all the possibilities!

My point is this:
In the moment of your greatest pain you will never feel the future joy of your
authentic happiness.
 

Just us darkness and light can never coexist together in the same moment; the seeds of change will never be a visible harvest which has fully blossomed. One must end for the other to begin. It’s all a process.

Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.

If you can stop to consider you don’t know what you don’t know, you don’t know if your perception of a bad thing in the present moment will not transform into a beautiful success of magnificent joy in the future. You just don’t know!

Here are a few simple steps to help you squeeze out the good in the midst of the bad.

Write down what you have learned from this (enter here) experience.

Example:
I have learned to not trust this person’s word – only their actions.
List the qualities you have appreciated in yourself in this experience.

Example:
I acted with honesty and integrity in this situation and I had the courage to communicate with this person with respect.
Make a promise to yourself of a good change you will implement immediately because of this experience.

Example:
I will accept people as they are and not try to change them. I will keep the focus on myself.

So remember, when you feel like all hope is lost, remember your feelings have nothing to do with the fact you have truly gained your ultimate greatness.                                                                                                                                                                   

 

Now on Kindle just $3.99!

Deb Scott, BA, CPC is a four-time award winning author of “The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue,” and a top rated Best Podcaster winner of “The Best People We Know Show” on blog talk radio, stitcher and player FM with over 1 million global listeners.  Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills.  In her personal life, Deb battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, depression, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation.  Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you. Sign up for Deb’s free mind vitamin monthly newsletter at:  http://www.GreenSkyandBlueGrass.com 

The Allergic to Negative People Pollution Solution

Pollution of every kind certainly catalyzes a visceral response of suffocation, oppression and even depression. “Let me out! I can’t breathe!” That’s what I’m talking about. Pollution that kills and destroys and sucks the life out of you. Pollution that you can visibly see, affect and avoid. Pollution you know is dangerous to your life and accept is all bad for your health. Pollution you don’t want in your life.

But what about the people who pollute your life with stress, anxiety, confusion and constant chaos? What about the people who pollute your life with manipulation, deceit and despair? What about the people who pollute your life with jealousy, rage and anger? What can you do to rid yourself of people pollution such as these?

People Pollution that negatively contaminates the environment of your life is a viral plague of poisonous people who need to be purposely pruned right out of your life.

What’s the pollution solution? How do you clear the smog of people pollution in your life? How do you cleanse your life from the symptoms of this contagious disease?

Smog be gone. Here’s four ways to quickly inject an antibiotic against the effects of this people pollution plague which silently infects the life of many innocent souls. It’s an easy recipe of mind vitamins to feed your whole soul and nurture your spirit with new strength and power to create renewed resistance against this saturating sickness.

1. People Pollution Exists – Accept it.

There is great power in accepting things as they are instead of how you want them to be. Why? Because when you accept the truth of a situation, you are free to make better choices with this knowledge. You must accept some people actually enjoy creating and being immersed in pollution, consciously or unconsciously. Your being uncomfortable with their polluting behavior will not motivate them to change, but it can help you change to feel better.

2. It’s not your fault – Don’t try to justify.

You did not cause the other person to create polluting behavior, and you can’t cure them of it either. Don’t accept unacceptable behavior. Resist the desire to justify bad polluting behavior, or think there is anything you can say or do to change the results of a polluter.

3. Decide for different – Imagine better possibilities & outcomes.

Once you decide you don’t want to be around polluting behavior you are ready to imagine new outcomes and better possibilities of not having that type of negatively affect you. You don’t know what you don’t know. Consider how much energy you will have available to do positive things in your life, when you get back all the precious energy you were expending trying to fight the people who were polluting your life.

4. Spread your Shine – Purify the pollution with positivity.

Let your positive sunshine burn their polluting smog right out of your life. Sticking to your positive standards of peace, compassion, creativity, enthusiasm, faith and confidence in a brighter day to keep you above the clouds like the sun in the sky. The best protection against people pollution is pollution rejection.

The winning equation to your sensational success in being free from the bad fruit of polluting people is accepting people pollution exists. Having a simple strategy to reject the effects of people who negatively pollute your life is a great way to build up a powerful immunity against this deadly disease.        

                                                                                           

Deb Scott, BA, CPC  is a four-time award winning author of “The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue,”  and a top rated Best Podcaster winner of “The Best People We Know Show” on blog talk radio, stitcher and player FM with over 1 million global listeners.  Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills.  In her personal life, Deb battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, depression, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation.  Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you.

Sign up for Deb’s free mind vitamin monthly newsletter at:  http://www.GreenSkyandBlueGrass.com

To Solve a Problem Do This

I don’t worry when I get up in the morning and everything looks blurry because I easily grab my reading glasses and suddenly the world is available to me in a crisp new way. In the same manner, when you feel frustrated, confused or discouraged, you can grab your God glasses and quickly transform what appears bad into something uniquely beautiful specifically wrapped as a custom gift created just for you.

God glasses are available in locations which supply God glasses. You can’t go to the hardware store bread, and you can’t find God glasses just anywhere. You must have the intention to get yourself a pair of God glasses, and then take action to purchase to wear.

I am going to tell you a secret.

God glasses are globally abundant in the most surprising places, and often overlooked by counterfeit products with less than satisfactory results. You have to check the label to make sure your pair is the high quality original name brand. I would suggest you find someone who has the genuine article, who experiences consistent results as promised, and purchase a pair from their same source.

My point is this; if you want to be free of frustration and those demons of doubt, you must be aware not every book, person or theory which claims success truly delivers it. Many self-help gurus claim they have the answer, and at the same time live a contradictory lie. Many shiny websites and fancy marketing campaigns hook you with a glittery veneer and empty contents.

What happens when you buy the lie? You don’t get the promised results. What happens then? You feel like YOU did something wrong because their system didn’t work for you and you subsequently feel even more frustrated, disappointed and discouraged than you did before. Consider the notion there is nothing wrong with you, and there is something wrong with them! You discovered a fraud, and that is not your fault.

I am challenging you to a new way of thinking.

 

Ask more questions, investigate third parties, be cautiously optimistic and believe you are far too precious to spend any amount of time in your life with people, places or things that do not meet standards of authenticity. Bad seeds will never grow a good harvest.

So next time you search for answers to solve a problem in your life, take a moment to pause, grab your God glasses, and know you’re worth the effort.

 

 

 

 

Deb Scott, BA, CPC  is a four-time award winning author of “The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue,”  and a top rated radio host of “The Best People We Know Show” which was a third place finalist in the 2012 Shorty Awards for best podcaster.  Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills.  In her personal life, Deb battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation.  Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you.

Why the Law of Attraction might not Be Working for You

I am the first one to agree your thoughts create your feelings, which then creates your actions, which subsequently builds the reality of your life. To that end, your thoughts can and do create your world.

But what happens when the law of attraction doesn’t seem to be working for you? What happens when you feel like you are doing all the right things, but you end up with all the wrong results. What then?

It deeply saddens me to see anyone beat themselves up for supposedly doing the ‘law of attraction’ wrong. Precisely when the person feels most down about a circumstance in life, the bulldozer of despair dumps a double dose of self-incriminating negativity.

“Why isn’t the law of attraction working for ME?”

Consider you are not doing anything wrong at all. Consider the equation is wrong. 2+ 3 will never equal 4, no matter how much you visualize and wish it to be true.

Could it be where the law of attraction ends where a little common sense needs to begin?

Would you think for one moment Rosa Parks needed to contemplate what the universe was trying to teach her to accept as she walked to the back of the bus because she was black, day in and day out, every day of her life? Would you for one second think that a Jewish victim at Auschwitz needed to contemplate what he/she was doing to attract being rolled into the incinerator to be burned alive? Do really believe the victims who had their limbs blown off in the Boston Marathon Bombing subconsciously put out a frequency with THAT on their Law of Attraction menu? Of course not!

The missing ingredient is thisgood and evil exists, and each person has free will to bring one or the other into the physical world we each live within. Good produces more good, and bad produces more bad. We are each planting seeds first in the garden of our own life, which then scatters more of the same into the lives of others around us.

Each thing in and of itself may not be good, but together they can produce good.

I recently discussed this notion with Cheryl Maloney on Empower Radio (click here to listen). Consider the thought of eating tablespoons of salt, a cup of sugar or raw eggs individually. Pucker up! It does not sound very good to me! Why? Because on their own it’s not. But, stir them all together with some flour, put the mixture in the oven, and viola’, you have angel food cake. Angel food cake is very good.

My point is this, certain things on their own are not always good, and never will be good. No amount of visualization is going to change that. What you can change is to see beyond the individual bad event, and extrapolate the present bad into the potential good result once it is wrapped with a new element of thought, action, belief, event, person, place or thing.

Life is not the all about “me” show, it’s the all about “we” show.

Consider your unfair boss is not the universe or God telling you to reflect and work through a possible childhood issue with an authority figure. Consider your boss needs to learn a lesson to be a fair boss, and you need to step out in courage to bring this to light, and in doing so you will have saved hundreds of other workers unjust treatment.

When the “I” becomes a “we” focus, even illness is transformed into wellness.

So next time you want to beat yourself up for not doing the law of attraction correctly to grab hold of the perfect life you have visualized in your on demand dream board, consider this: You didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, you may be doing something very right.

 

 

 

Deb Scott, BA, CPC   is a four-time award winning author of The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue,” and a top rated radio host of The Best People We Know Show” which was a third place finalist in the 2012 Shorty Awards for best podcaster. Deb spent twenty years as a cardiovascular surgical specialist, winning numerous awards for outstanding sales and leadership skills. In her personal life, Deb has battled sexual abuse, others’ alcoholism, dysfunctional relationships, was the sole caregiver to both her parents who fought cancer to their death, and even experienced financial devastation. Today, Deb helps people turn things around in their business, or the business of living, with the discovery of the amazing you.

 

Stop Negative Thinking: You vs Your Thoughts

I feel better just reading the blog post headline! Don’t you?

What Are You Thinking?

How to get rid of feeling negative, stressed out, or emotionally charged is a desirable result for most of us, but not necessarily easily achieved by any of us.

Here is a simple “Ah Ha” moment to help shift your perception of how easily it really can be to accomplish.

You are NOT your thoughts.

Why is accepting this knowledge a critical first step towards freedom and success?

Once you know your thoughts, which create the feeling, are separate from the truth of who you are, you are able to make a choice whether that thought will be permitted to create a feeling inside you – negative or positive. Why?

Consider the following image and analogy:

When you are at home, people often come and knock on your door. You pause, look at who it is, and decide if you are going to let them into your home. Your home is your safe and sacred sanctuary and you don’t just let anyone in.  You may speak to them at the door if they are a stranger, or immediately invite them in if you recognize them as loving family or friends.

Now, replace you as the house itself, thoughts are the strangers or friends knocking at your door, and your decision to open or close the door is the power of choice you possess as a result of pausing to assess the quality of thoughts knocking at your door. The thoughts knocking outside your front door are not part of you in the house, but separate entities outside your home. Thoughts knocking for your permission to come inside and be part of your home require your approval and permission to enter.

How does that scenario feel to you?

Your thoughts are what create your feelings – negative or positive. Without the thought first, the feeling can not exist. This knowledge gives you power to understand by pausing and analyzing what the thought is, or what is knocking at your door, before accepting it. This is the real key to controlling how you feel.

Have you ever found yourself saying, “Why am I thinking about that?” The fact you separate yourself “why am I” from the thought “thinking that” clearly demonstrates the distinction between you and your thoughts.

You must think about what you are going to think about! It’s your choice, and easier to do, even really fun, once you are aware you can do it.

 

Deb Scott, BA, CPC

Deb is Author of the National Four time Award Winner Book in: Self-Help | Motivation | Best New Non-Fiction | Self-Improvement; The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue - , a Certified Professional Coach at Discover the Amazing YOU! Coaching, and host of the Top Rated Best People We Know Show! on Blog Talk Radio. Self HelpRadio

Taking complex issues and making them easy to understand. Simple Steps to Stop Suffering Now! Now available on Kindle.

Sign up for Debs “Mind Vitamins” Newsletter today!

10 Tips to Making Good Decisions

By Certified Coach
Deb Scott 

 

“Should I, or shouldn’t I?”

The question is not if you must make decisions, but how to make  good decisions.

Here are my Top 10 Tips to Make Good Decisions.

 

 Making Good Decisions

 

1  Write down the Objective.

What is it you ultimately want to accomplish.  Get a new job, move or start a business is not specific enough.  The objective should be clearly stated in a way which describes the benefits of achieving the goal.  “I want to move to a warm climate where I can engage in outdoor activities year round and simply my life with a lower cost of living.”  VS “I want to move.”

2.  Collect Facts:  Good AND Bad

Do your Homework and gather all the information, good and bad, like and dislike.  You are not making the decision here, just a sound assessment of all your options for consideration.  There is no rush to get through this critical step.  Researcher Paul Nutt states, “Only 1 in 10 decisions is urgent. Only 1 in 100 is a crisis. You have time to reflect.”   The more time you take to gather all the information, the better your decision is likely to be.

3. List Possible Consequences of Decision

Brain storm all the possible outcomes of each decision and choice.  Detach from the emotion – focus on all the possibilities.  What would happen if? How would I feel if?   Listing extreme positives and negatives at this stage is a good idea.

4. Do a Gut Check

Now that you have completed the above steps, sit in a quiet spot where you will not be disturbed and visualize each scenario you have listed.  How does you gut feel?  Is your stomach in knots?  Is your heart beating with excitement?  Pay attentions to what your body is telling you and write it down.

5. Don’t Over Think

Avoid placing judgement on what you have written down.  Be open to the fact you might not know, what you don’t know.

6.  Make the Decision

Review the good work you have completed and tabulate what choice brings you the most favorable results, along with the most positive physical gut reaction.  These facts will lead you to the best choice.  remember, the best choice is not the perfect choice.  There is no perfect choice.

7. Stick with Your Decision

Once you have made your decision, trust the process.  Follow-through to the end, because you don’t want to give up 5 minutes before the miracle.

8.  Give Yourself Permission to Navigate the Unexpected

Be sensible in the sense you must give yourself permission to navigate differently in the event of an unexpected crisis.  Obviously ‘life is happening while you make other plans’, so know that even the best thought out plan will be altered in the face of earth quakes and funerals.

9.  Review and Assess

Take time to review and asses your progress often.  This will encourage you to continue when you are able to validate positive results, and tweak your direction as needed to maintain forward momentum.

10. No Regrets

Regardless of what you expected your decision to create, congratulate yourself that you made the best decision possible with the information you had available to you at the time.  There is not a person alive, and especially some of the greatest successes in history, who hasn’t had the opportunity to learn from a decision.

Following these 10 tips allows you to follow a logical process of consequences based on completion of each task.  The answers unfold naturally for you, rather than you struggling to make something fit where it does not belong.

 

 The Rational Planning Model

 

“The rational planning model is the process of realizing a problem, establishing and evaluating planning criteria, creating alternatives, implementing alternatives, and monitoring progress of the alternatives. It is used in designing neighborhoods, cities, and regions. The rational planning model is central in the development of modern urban planning and transportation planning.”

Remember, good decision-making is a skill, and like any skill it can be learned.  The more you practice this process of good decision-making, the more skilled you will become at making good decisions every day!

 

Be sure to get Deb’s Free Mind Vitamin Minutes Ebook!   Click Here Now.

How Bamboo Taught Me to Be Happy – 3 Things it Can Teach You Too

Lessons from Bamboo

I believe all of nature speaks loudly the lessons we most need to know, but the unique attributes of beautiful Bamboo resonate especially clear the life lessons we most need to hear to live a happy life.

Widely know as a symbol of good luck, a Bamboo plant with “three stalks is considered good for happiness, five for health, two for love, eight for wealth, nine stalks for overall goodness and prosperity in the owner’s life.”

Not so widely known is the fact Bamboo is one of the strongest and fastest growing plants on Earth. Bamboo is used in a wide variety of venues such as; food, medicine, construction, paper, fabric, furniture and even music.

Want to get solutions to your problems? Be like Bamboo and live a happy life. Here’s why…

 

1. Be Open to Be Strong

Don’t let the hollow tubing in Bamboo deceive you. What you think may appear weak, is actually strong. The open cylinders characteristic of bamboo are solid vehicles to transport water in irrigation systems, surviving tough winters and the hottest of summers.

To receive a new of thinking, being, and doing, we have to be open to receive like the hollow channels characteristic in bamboo.

Only when we are open to receive, can we be a channel to transport wisdom, knowledge and love. In the the openness of bamboo, there is also strength.

2. Be Flexible in Storms

Bamboo is often the only thing left in tact even after the highest winds of a typhoon. The tall stalks move with the wind, not against it.

The bamboo trunk will sway and bend with the wind, while its roots remain firmly rooted in the ground. It bends, but does not break.

When storms come towards you in life, and they always will, lean with the process, not against it. “What can I learn from this problem, discomfort or difficultly?” There is always something good which can come out of something bad if we stay firmly rooted in the solid values which give purpose to our unique existence.

3. Be an Instrument of Healing


While the Bamboo flute is known to make some of the most lovely music, it is rarely recognized for its medicinal properties in healing the ills of the body or mind.

Bamboo as a medicine “is especially used for the disorder of hot phlegm that coats or obstructs the “orifices of the heart,” affecting the brain functions. Thus, it is used for epilepsy, fainting and loss of consciousness in feverish diseases, and a variety of mental disorders.”

Unsuspecting, Bamboo is a source for successful solutions to a wide variety of problems and needs. There is no part of the Bamboo which is wasted, it is all good.

“The bamboo in its simplicity expresses its usefulness. Man should do the same.” Aikido master Kensho Furuya

Deb Scott, BA, CPC
Deb is Author of the 2 x National Award Winning Book The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue – turning your upside down world right side up!, a Certified Professional Coach at Discover the Amazing YOU! Coaching, and host of the hit new Best People We Know Show! On Blog Talk Radio. Self Help Radio.

 

Get Deb’s FREE Mind Vitamin Ebook now! - Click Here.

The Happiness Quiz: Which One of These are YOU?

The Happiness Quiz: Which one of these are you?

That’s the topic of a recent pollI posted on my Linkedin Community. The overall results, and the breakdown in; age, gender, and job titles were amazing.

Sharing is caring, so here’s the quiz – (perhaps you want to take it now before read the rest of the story?!)

Which one of the following most reduces your ability to be happy?

  • Problem People in my life.
  • Other.
  • Negative &/or Distorted Thinking.
  • My Health.
  • Not enough money.

Here’s the overall results:

Happiness Quiz - Overall Results

“Experts attribute about 50% of a person’s happiness to genetic endowments and another 10% to circumstances – where we live, how much money we make, how healthy we are.”

Good News! This means you have 40% of your own happiness within your control!

The first step toward achieving any new action is awareness. Once you are aware of what may be catalyzing your unhappiness, you can accept it, and inject a new response to create a new result.

Let’s take a look at the Happiness Quiz Breakdown:

By Age:

Happiness Quz - By Age

By Gender:

Happiness Quiz - By Gender

By Job Title:

Happiness Quiz - Job Title

By Job Function:

Happiness Quiz - Job Function

and last but not least..

By Company Size :

Happiness Quiz - Company Size

Do these results surprise you?  The fact most people found thier distorded thinking the primary happiness obstacle VS  how much money they had, was amazing.

Money can’t buy you happiness. In fact, the pursuit to make a lot of may be stealing your happiness!

Psycholigist conducted a study on this topic using data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics. Check out this extremely telling information:

“Men making more than $100,000 per year spend 19.9 percent of their time on passive leisure, compared to 34.7 percent for men making less than $20,000. ”

“Women making more than $100,000 spend 19.6 percent of their time on passive leisure, compared with 33.5 percent of those making less than $20,000.”

“Wealthy people, it seems, spend so much time chasing the money that they don’t have enough time left to use in a way that makes them happy. People with lower incomes spend more time enjoying themselves.”

So don’t believe the lie you can’t be happy in these tough economic times.  Most of your happiness depends on the moods your thoughts create-  not the amount of money you have to make.

Scientist report “even small improvements in mood can have positive cascading effects.” These seemingly simple strategies, promise powerful lasting results.

The take-a-way;  your commitment to being consistent and persistent using your happiness tools, is the golden key to unlocking your happiness door.

“Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.” Aristotle

Here are some tips to turn the insanity of unhappiness into the clarity of powerful happy producing habits:

  • 1. Accept ‘You don’t know what you don’t know.”If you don’t know every piece of information on planet earth – you have a reciprocal amount of ideas which you have the opportunity to learn, to help you be happy. That’s a lot of information!
  • 2. Practice “Successful Sabotage”If self-sabotage is setting yourself up for failure, successful sabotage can be setting yourself up for success! Strategically placing positive affirmations, photo’s, or even trinkets, in places where you will be forced to stumble upon them throughout your day, can ignite a positive cascade in your head. Consistency conquers
  • 3. Be a “2 Minute Volunteer” You can’t give what you don’t have, and you can’t have, what you’re not willing to give away. Why not share your favorite affirmation on a sticky note – in your bills, to the people you work with, attach it to your email’s? It’s not the amount of physical time you take to volunteer, it’s the sincerity in your heart with which you give the love away, which matters.

You spend more time with YOU than anyone else. If you can’t enjoy your own company, how do you expect anyone else to?!

Your self-talk is built by your thoughts. Apparently we each have 50,000 thoughts per day. (Who is it that measures these things!) Unfortunately for many the vast majority of those 50,000 are repetitive, negative thoughts – focused on the things you should have done, things that went wrong, how you aren’t good enough, the list goes on.”

Remember, each one of these conversations you’re having with yourself in your head, is being reinforced and recorded in your memory. Not only the thought, but the accompanying positive or negative feeling it ignites – again and again!

You have a choice. Dedicate yourself to implementing strategies which help you win the battle in your mind. Recruit a solid strong army of amazing positive change agents in your head, and dump the junk those negative demolition demons seek to repeat.

Don’t let your happiness come from other people’s minds. Get involved in the direction and quality of your life this very moment. If fact, CONGRATULATIONS! by reading this article  you’ve already begun.

Remember – You’re Worth the Effort!

 
 
 Be sure to get Deb’s FREE Mind Vitamin Minutes E-Book - Click Here 

 

FORGIVENESS – Feeling or Action?

For a long time I struggled with being able to forgive. Maybe you have felt the same way?  How do you really forgive?

In my “green sky” upside down thinking, I always thought forgiveness had to be a feeling. Something that made ME feel better inside towards the person I was trying to forgive. A futile effort that never seemed to grab the core of my heart.

Forgiveness is Freeing!

What I have learned in my new right side up, “blue sky” world, is that forgiveness is an ACTION word.

If forgiveness was a feeling, you might as well take [Read more...]